Soldier. Colt. Simple man.
Sometimes, I long for the salad days of social media when people shared trivia, pics of puppies and kids, videos of cats doing all sorts of strange things, recipes and good deals on fresh produce.
Actually, I long for them all the time. It was fun. All fun. There was decorum, and the worst thing that could happen was someone posting a pic of himself having a little too much fun at the Federation for Electric Train Manufacturers Convention in Eau Claire, Wisconsin.
The election of 2016 came along and sullied me on social media for awhile. Perhaps a long while. It forever changed how I will both view and use the media. Sure, look hard enough and study long enough and you can find those people who continue to use Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest for innocent, fun-loving posts. But don't be surprised when that long, lost friend from high school who seems just as sweet and amicable as ever (posting recipes for stuffed meatballs and pics of her puppy eating a stuffed meatball) throws you an unexpected curveball, replete with all manner of profanity and innuendo about the views of a U.S. Senator four states away from where she lives. It will be a shock to your system.
At first, I thought I would become numb to the insanity spewed from both ideological sides in the run-up to the election. Instead, I became enraged that our system had become thus: if you don't believe me, I can shout louder...then maybe you will.
So I shut it down. Cold turkey. I took a break, and I have enjoyed it more than I can describe. Still, I've missed my friends. So I have been dipping my toe back in, not without unfollowing and even unfriending some of the most blatant offenders of the all-fun social media lifestyle.
It was into this context I discovered Capt. Andrew Luck. Soldier. Colt. Simple man. Someone, somewhere decided that Andrew Luck, quarterback of the Indianapolis Colts looked a bit like a Civil War soldier with his slightly (well, let's call it like it is, grossly) unkempt beard. So in Twitter, Capt. Luck tweets about his game prep, game play and game recap in the voice of a Civil War participant.
It's hilarious. The first one makes you chuckle. The fifth one makes you laugh. And by the 10th post, you're into the story and it grows better and better.
Dearest mother — We're marching home to again battle Texans. Capt. Brock of Osweiler Riverlands is of poor aim, but large stature. — Andrew
Dearest mother — We secured a victory, but it was a blood bath the likes of which we have never seen. Jet men do not fly, nor fight. — Andrew
I don't know who this is. And I don't care. The freshness of someone just having fun again and not finding the need to espouse an opinion or pass along a news story or demean another human has made my day.
Every medium evolves. Social media is barely 10 years old. When television was 10 years old it still showed announcers reading off scripts into microphones (the way radio announcers had previously). So there is no way to know what social media might look like in another 10, 20 or 30 years. It's pretty safe to say it'll be around. After all, our new president finds Twitter to be a giant megaphone through which he can say anything he wants, as long as it's 140 characters or fewer.
But thank God for Capt. Andrew Luck.